Shermance's Cancer Fight: Bobble Head

One of Shermance's favorite things to say when she walks around the house showing her bald head is "I'm a Bobble Head. Look at me, the Bobble Head!" She's referring to those 6 inch tall characters that have heads with springs inside that allow the head to wiggle when moved. It's a naked feeling not having any hair, and although it may feel awkward and like her head isn't really her own it does offer 2 distinct advantages: 1) drying time after showers is significantly reduced and 2) we've found that kissing the back of her hear gives her goose bumps all over and tickles all up her spine. At this point she still has lots of stubble, but also patches are completely gone and her eybrows, much to her chagrin, have thinned a bit. Even if she were a bobble head, I'd have to say she's a mighty pretty one.

Within the last week I've noticed that sometimes Shermance gets sad for no apparent reason. Even she can't explain it. She's not sad about the cancer or any event - she just feels down in the dumps. She had heard about Chemo Depression and our strategy was to keep her so busy with work, volunteering and normal family duties so she wouldn't slip into the sadness. After VBS today, she just wanted to be alone. She snuck off in our bedroom with her iPad (not unusual) and a bag of chips (very unusual) to stay away from our boys and the neighbor they invited over. Shermance thought she had a perfect hiding place, but she was found out and, of course, she was asked to share her chips. She politely declined. Not sure if she pulled the cancer card. Ha!

Actually being a crew leader at VBS this week was a wonderful outlet for Shermance to be goofy with the kids and have a great time, but the downside is VBS was just half a day, so afternoons that were left unplanned allowed for the tears to creep in and an Eeyore dull frown to take over her face. Extra hugs have been welcome medicine this week. I don't think it helps that she's built up in her mind that this next chemo will be much worse than the last one which knocked her down for about 5 days. She's scared. She's worried. And she really wishes this were done.

Even though there have been sad times this week, there are still so many people offering support and love. For example Monika made her favorite M&M cookies and shared them with Shermace. The Smiths brought over a croched blanket that was hand-made by a woman in her church. Many people within the church prayed over the blanket to help with her healing before it was presented to her today. It's purple which represents survival! AMAZING. A couple weeks back Shermance even received a bracelet off a patient's arm who also dealt with cancer. When Shermance noticed it, the woman paid it forward immediately... We've found the wonder of humanity in so many ways through this gut-wrenching experience.

One more funny thing to tell...Shermance is keeping up her Tae Kwon Do training with the rest of our family. We all try to attend classes together and today was one of the days we all made it. Shermance and the boys are 2nd and 3rd degree black belts and I'm a lowly yellow belt. In our combined class today, after lots of work on our forms and our kicks we spent some time on weapons. The weapon of the day was sanjaban (often better known by the Japanese name nunchuck) or as it is comonly called in class, "two sticks and a string". This time we tried an advanced move flipping the weapon over the hand in a 360 spin as we were striking and when going back and forth. Near the end of class as the next class was gathering in the viewing area, our instructor, Mr Shin, asked us to add a toss. This seemed to completely throw off Shermance. It just wasn't working. She dropped it every time. Seeing her struggles Mr. Shin focused on Shermance to give her more specific instruction. She watched. She listened intently. And then she tried it herself and failed or shall I say "flailed" miserbly. In fact, one time she threw it straight up into the ceiling fan which shot it at a ceiling tile, popping it out of place and indenting a hole in the tile. She was so embarrassed! Everyone else couldn't concentrate on their practice because we were all laughing so hard. It didn't stop Shermance from trying some more (bless her heart), but it seems she just might need a bit more practice...and a bit less flailing. Ha!

Chemo #3 tomorrow. Wish us the best!